Very Mature

 

Very Mature

 

I’m very mature. Grown up, distinguished gentleman. I am totally in control my impulses. When a woman at work stands on one leg and leans forward like a ballerina, I don’t make a joke that “usually there’s a tree involved.” Not I.

I only use the politically correct terms of the current times. Not the old times. I update my lexicon with the newest speak. I laugh at cats peeing in the toilet. Hehe peepee weewee!

I do what I’m told. And I like it. I listen and learn, because I don’t know any so teachers are always learning me. I don’t criticize. I apologize. I am invalid. Wrong. Talk over me.

It doesn’t entertain me, titillate me, make my pupils dilate and cheeks rise to say naughty things that I’m told are impolite.

I am old growth. Grow me no more.